Insight Of An Almost Chaotic Life!

    I moved for 8 times during my life, and I have no doubt that many moves are waiting ahead for me. The closest to stability for me was 3 years and I am a professional  when it comes to shoving my life in boxes. 

True, it is always a great conversation starter, I like to see people's fascinated eyes when I tell them my story, it's abnormal for them, just as much as it is odd for me to live in the same place through your whole life. 

Bur what have I learnt from it, though? 

   

1-You get too good at saying goodbyes! 

Yes, goodbyes and splits break your heart way too often that you simply get used to it. You realize at such a young age that nothing last forever and it is better to enjoy the journey rather than the destiny itself.

  

        2-Friendship? Never heard of it! 

Maybe this is the part that still tortures me until this day, making friends and leaving them in such a short amount of time is hard, because no matter how much you promised your bff that you can do long distance, trust me, it is not going to work. 

Making friends in new places was a new challenge every time, the more I grow up the hardest it gets, I still can't get it though, maybe as we get older, we become more aware of fakery, hypocrisy and shallowness? Maybe.

   3-Fresh start every time! 

Sometimes, a new place is what you actually need, a new city, a new school, a new life! I can't count how many times moving was helpful for my well being, it gave me an opportunity to begin something new every time, and I know this is not a given bliss for everyone.

   4-Belonging somewhere, please? 

It is so frustrating to feel like the outsider, all the time. Moving that much made me realize that I don't belong anywhere, I needed a place, I needed a city, I needed a neighborhood to feel belonged, and I would never understand this feeling, the feeling of being attached to a city, a place where you always return to it at the end of the day, a place you simply call home. 

   5-Fast bloomer! 

The amount of changes I witnessed around me during my 20 years of existence made me change myself from the inside too, it wasn't a choice, it was unavoidable. And maybe it took some times to understand this but, those moves are who I am today, and I wouldn't have picked it another way. No matter how much I cried while stuffing cardboard boxes with my things, the person I am today would have never existed without those tears. 

After all, we learn the hard way, don't we? 

In the end, it never gets easy, because every move seems like the first one ever, no matter how you have trained your heart and mind to get used to it. And it's natural, human instincts are made to be satisfied with stability and an idea of a home, and even if this idea changes every 3 years of my life, I managed to find comfort in a discomfort, somehow!