Solitude, My Best Friend!

  Solitude, what a monster! It seems like every one's biggest nightmare, but we will face it at least once in our life. How can we adapt to it? make it less frightening? 
Let's start by explaining why loneliness is our number one enemy. Well, we simply fear the echo of our thoughts, and once we are alone, our minds get even louder. Somehow, forcing ourselves to think positively only pulls us to the darkest parts of our mind. 
  Things can get out of control, loneliness can switch a cheerful and delighted person to a gloomy, low and deplorable person. 
  Being all by yourself surrounded by 4 walls is not the greatest experience of your life, but I have managed to gather enough tips to make the most out of anyone solo time. 

  1-Get organized!
I don't know about you, but whenever I am alone, my place looks like a real mess. I lose all my will to function as a human being, and hibernate in my bed sounds like a terrific idea. But, it takes only few minutes to be on the right track. I like to start with tiding my bed, one of the simplest tasks, but it can instantly change my mood. Having an organized environment stimulates your brain to structure your thoughts more effectively. 

  2-Eat real food! 
Cooking nowadays is no longer an unprecised science only designed for a group of people. Cooking had never been this easy. Get your grocery right, learn how to prepare a few easy meals and don't be afraid to fail. Nourishing yourself with the right nutriment will make you more aware of your health and how your body function. Take advantage of your solitude to come in touch with your body, it will thank you later, I promise. 

  3-Treat yourself, the healthy way! 
Enough with the unproductive activities (binge watching, stuffing your face with fatty food...), and learn how you can treat yourself the right way. The options are endless, you can start by picking up a new hobby, and finish with a home made facial sort of spa. Find what suits you and enjoy yourself while doing it. 

  4-Go out, it's mandatory! 
Going out alone is a unique experience everyone should try. Let aside the fear of strangers glancing at you, and go out! Anywhere your heart feels like going: a burger place, a fancy restaurant, a park, a museum...Don't make your solitude an excuse to lock yourself in your place. 

  5-Welcome failure with arms wide open...
Have in mind that it is never going to be perfect. Going through loneliness gets more challenging as time goes on. So there will be days where you will spend 90% of your day laying in bed and losing count of how many movies you have watched. Remind yourself of your strength, and you can always start over. 


  Everyone has their dark thoughts, and loneliness is the perfect opportunity for our demons to come alive before our eyes. But let's not all forget, being alone tests first our will and determination. No matter how challenging it can get sometimes, it is only forging us to be better human beings. 

Downsides of Univesity

I like to describe myself as a very steady person. My parents were always proud of me at school, even if they didn't say it much, I had everything organized, I liked to be prepared even for the tiniest thing in life. 

But one thing I wasn't prepare for is living on my own at university. I was unused to the amount of solitude I had to endure each day, it took me by surprise, I didn't have a clue how to manage it. It was then when I stared locking myself, in my room, avoiding any sort of social interaction. I spent days without actually talking, without a single word coming out of my mouth. I found myself staring at the walls and crying myself to sleep. I used to count before I could fall asleep, 1, 2, 3.....I even reached 200 sometimes. I was so excited and optimistic about living alone, growing up, making new friends that are more likely to stuck with me for a life time, but it was hell. It was the time for every freshly graduated kid to shine, and I wasn't shining, my life became gloomier the more I saw how blooming and delightful the other kids were. 

And I was thinking to myself, how am I supposed to carry on for more than 5 years in here? Should I go out more? I even googled "how to make friends" and binged watch "life-coaches" videos on how to be more social. 
During my school years, I was never the weirdo, I was rather the popular kid, a bit nerdy, true, but making friends wasn't a worry of mine. How can solitude turn me into the opposite of who I used to be just one year ago? 

This is just a brief story with a strong message: mental health is crucial when it comes to college students, the amount of stress they are facing every day and the new abrupt life style they are experiencing is hard enough to make them go into a spiral of dark thoughts. 

My experience made me more aware of myself as an emotional creature, I became aware of how a healthy mind will bring a healthy life in all its aspects, and definitely, it's surely fine not to feel fine sometimes, the sadness is here to be embraced and dealt with, no ignored and neglected. 
Stay strong new college kids!